A crucial lesson you can learn from the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders
So, I was mooching around my study recently, pondering the many email ideas I have brewing in the brainstem to help you, my dear friend.
This is my natural state, slowly pacing around my home, most likely peering out of the window at intervals, scribbling notes on my whiteboard in between typing away like a frenzied Yokai of old Japanese superstition.
I tell you this to set the scene for the Netflix documentary that was thrust upon my delicate equilibrium. Using every white-hat persuasive technique at a woman's disposal, my girl convinced me to watch a documentary series... about the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders.
And whilst I put up a noble front of pretending to have no interest in watching several young ladies jump into the splits in synchronised agony... I watched the hell out of that shyt, and remembered a valuable lesson that I impart now unto you.
The lesson came after a particularly "emotional" scene, where (spoiler alert) a handsy cameraman had copped himself a feel of one of the cheerleader's derrieres. I'm no lawyer, nor do I concern myself with the current state of gender dynamics, but according to the show, that shyt was schexual ass-phalt. "You're going to jail, pal," vibes.
Back in the locker room, the cheerleaders talked about how it's not acceptable... because they aren't products, they're people.
I'm sorry... not products? That's where I respectfully have to disagree.
The only reason you're in the stadium is because you've been meticulously crafted into a product by the director of DCC, Kelli Finglass. The company sells merch of you for Christ's sake...
The cognitive dissonance was fascinating to watch as they all agreed that they definitely weren't products, they were people...
But failed to see the irony that they had all chosen to dehumanise themselves in a vain attempt to seek fame.
Now, their loss? Your gain.
For you and I are products the very same.
The difference is that if you lean into becoming a product, you can reap the rewards online, where there's no chance of you being groped.
Becoming a product isn't an unintentional accident. It requires a set of choices, many of which aren't available to just anyone. These copywriting strategies only work if you go all in. "He who becomes a beast rids himself of the pain of being a man," type shi.
If you have the copywriting stomach for it, I can show you the way. Not for the faint of heart.
Go here if you dare:
James Perkins
