The Copy Viking rips my sales letter apart
Following on from yesterday's post... I was lucky enough to get feedback on my 'selling the unsellable' sales letter from not just Thom Benny, but also his protégé, Elmo Lehti, AKA The Copy Viking.
Now, if you don't know Elmo... then you really should.
Elmo's copy chops have him quickly shimmying up the DR ranks, with highly influential YouTubers flying internationally to sign contracts with him and offer him lucrative rev share deals (his latest one is offering 40% rev share).
With Elmo securing up to $22,000 for one month of work, needless to say, his feedback was extremely valuable…
And so I shall share with you, my loyal reader:
This is awesome. I really like the headline with that contrast. It almost reads like you get a town for $9.99, which made me very curious.
That being said, the headline didn't really pay off. I can see how it's connected to the offer and the rest of the sales page, but I should not need to use my brain too much to understand the connection. The connection is there, but the open loop just needs to be closed, so the reader won't need to use too much of their brain power.
Also, it's clearly for local home service providers, and that could be clearer in the language throughout the sales page. There is a mention of 'contractor' in the beginning, but I completely missed that the first time I read it, so I was a bit confused about who this offer is for, until the end.
There is also the potential angle of 'the richest demographic that no ads, SEO, or any other internet marketing can reach, who want and need your services,' that could be used here. Relating to how the older folks don't use the internet but still need their problems fixed, but they don't know how to go about it, as everything is on the internet nowadays.
Some objections that came up:
Why would I buy yours if there is one in my grandpa's attic?
Are the numbers still in use, or am I just buying an outdated phonebook?
Both could be answered by saying that the outdated numbers have been crossed out or that the numbers have been checked to be still in use.
Overall, good stuff!
Want this level of in-depth, expert feedback on your copy?
Here's the link:
https://www.skool.com/direct-response-guild
James Perkins
P.S. Full disclaimer: if you join using the link above, I get a kickback every quarter you're a Guild member. If this bothers you, you can simply not use this link. Google is your friend.
